I can finally sit down and really think through a deeper post. I've been covering a lot of events and incidents, so I haven't really had much time to look back on the year.
2009 was quite a tragic year I guess. My parents finally got their official divorce. Jace's dad died, as did Candice and Wendy's. Veronica Ho died. Not to mention celebrity deaths like Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, David Carradine, Patrick Swayze, Natasha Richardson and Brittany Murphy. And those are only the ones I remember. Yeaps. Definitely a lot of notable deaths. The hospital was also a place to go, as I visited Gary and Cindy, who both had major injuries.
On a brighter note, I made a lot of new friends this year, and things got comfortable in school in terms of friends. Kok Kin quit TOA, as did Ivan and Licia and very recently my classmate, Pei Yeng. However, Essenism started mixing around more. I got to know a schoolmate named Andrew, who's damn smart (the guy's in Mensa) and very often he hung out with us. My friendship with Neal grew, and a classmate I never spoke to before, Ash, also has become close friends with us. It was during this year that I also got to know Jonathan Chong better, as did all of us, and have become close as well. So yeah, the people I hang out with almost daily are extremely varied, with people in different classes and different majors. For two semesters last year, it was very easy to meet up, and we'd call each other, deciding where to eat, where to meet up and we'd talk practically about everything. Introducing one another was very easy, and with the exception of Miki and Andrew, everyone gets along very well.
Carmen, from England also visited because her mom dropped by, and it was good to catch up. She's grown to be very beautiful, and it's been years since I last saw her (in a bikini, mind you =x). Very cool, how we've stayed friends even after first knowing each other over 10 years ago, over different continents.
For church, it was great as well. I was in charge of designing much for the cellgroup. I did the slideshow for Issey's birthday, and did the cellgroup multiplication video, which was torture, but immensely satisfying. I've also become the songsheet bulletin designer for the cellgroup, and W49 too. I've gotten to be very close with Ai Lee, thanks to her driving me back every week, and we share everything. And only recently, although I've known Kai Yih for close to a year, have I become close with her as well. Lionel and Andre (Jessica's brother), who came during Emerge, have very quickly become some of the closest friends I have in the cellgroup as well. There's much I share with them, and hanging out, even though we've known one another for 3 months. Spiritually, I think in terms of growth its slowed but been very steady. I don't learn so much and all that in terms of amounts, but I've grown, and its very consistent.
I guess I have gone clubbing in 2009 much more too. It's gotten me several friends, and I still can't get drunk, only very mildly intoxicated at most. I guess that's a good thing, following the Bible, but sometimes its tempting and (at times) frustrating that I can't get drunk too. It's given me much fun though, and I guess a few "physical" moments.
It was also a time of exploration. Because I had photography as a subject in the last semester, I went to many places I don't think I'd have ever visited to take pictures. Your mind changes, as does your perspective on pictures and what you see plus how you see them. I think I'll go into detail in another post, but photography was definitely my favourite subject, although the printing made it the most costly too. Zzz.
Ah, and how about love? Quite a sucky year for love. Khar Loo ended up getting attached with Clarence. That felt like overseas betrayal. Lmao. Things with Cindy also didn't go through, as I've mentioned in several posts. Sure, I went out with her one on one, but that was just totally platonic, even if I did accidentally grab her hand. And now? Well... let's see what 2010 brings. After all, it's still in progress.
It's hard to believe a year has passed so fast. Time does fly. I'm entering 2010 with surprising optimism, I don't know why. And as for resolutions? I haven't come up with any yet. Gimme a bit of time =x.
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Ah, back in Kuala Lumpur. A new semester, and a new year. Welcome 2010.
I've enjoyed my time in Singapore. This time round, it was cut short due to the school's extra lessons eating up the first week of our holidays. Although it was short, I still managed to meet up with some friends and all. I went over to Koh Wee's place a few times, and played Modern Warfare 2, which is freaking fun! And the map Rusty is like the best! Although the knives are damn what the hell -.-. Heh... there was quite a bit of spirituality too, as I went for the Christmas services, and the very first night I came back, I attended an overnight prayer meeting from 9pm-3am. Not to mention the services on the weekend. And I also attended the MJ Zone appreciation. Ever since GT zone was disbanded, I've felt kind of left out of CHC SG, since the cellgroup's in GT are all scattered. I don't know three quarters of MJ zone. Well, at least I know Min Jin, due to Emerge 2006. That was unforgettable, thanks to Chin Yong. I doubt there's anyone reading this who knows what happened back then. Well, due to certain circumstances, Chin Yong scolded some pastors during Emerge basketball in 2006. Well, Min Jin was one of them. And even now he still remembers me. Hm?
I also got to catch up with Debbie and Joycelyn, and had a good dinner at Breeks (one of my fave places to eat) where we caught up with so much laughter and fun. Good times! Debbie also sneakily got me a Christmas present. She checked out the wristbands I was wearing, and my rings, and later "went to the washroom" but bought me a gift I didn't have instead. Wow! Sneaky! But thanks very much! I like the gift. Speaking of gifts, this was probably the Christmas where I received the most expensive gifts altogether. Ruz gave me a Chivas Regal aged 21 years, which is worth like $900. And my dad gave me some Issey Miyake scented thingy that cost over RM 200. From the Christmas cellgroup meeting, I ended up with a mirror with a cow motif from Natalie, due to the random gift exchanges. Faith also got me a book. I'm a bloody bookworm so she hit the spot. Yeah, much thanks to you all. And that reminds me, I lost the wristband Essenism gave me! I feel freaking guilty about it. One of the nights, I was at a LANshop (cybercafe, for KL-ians) and was playing Left 4 Dead 2 with Dexter, Kwok Weng and Jonathan. I took it off 'cause it kept rubbing on the table. When we went off, I completely forgot about it! When I went back to check, it was gone. Staff said it was most likely stolen. Zzz... sorry guys!
I lost another wristband after I went clubbing with Darren and Gary at Double O last time. And now another one. Geez. I keep losing stuff everytime I go back. And I'm not the only one who lost something. Candice and Wendy lost their father. After a normal phone call to his wife, their dad died just 10 minutes later. Heart failure was the suggested cause of death, but its not concrete because he was healthy, had no illnesses and just died out of the blue. Hard to imagine. they were totally heart-broken. For their privacy, I guess I shouldn't say anymore. But... stay strong =).
Yeah, the last time I came down, I attended Jace's dad's funeral, and now Candice and Wendy's. This marks my 9th funeral attendance. I know there'll be more in the future, but I'd really hope it's not when I come down to Singapore, which is when I expect fun and good times. And I realize I didn't mention about the previous time I came down to Singapore. I guess I'll mention it briefly here. This was like back in August or something. My last holiday. Like I mentioned, I didn't meet a lot of people, but the quality time spent was great, with all the people I met up with. I spent much time with Juswin, and he finally introduced me to his girlfriend Cherryl. I knew Cherryl and spoke to her once, but that was it. I knew a lot of guys liked her, and Juswin was chasing her. After I moved to KL, he'd talk to me about her, and I'd give him tips, telling him what to do, what to say, and he nailed it. It's very satisfying to see your "efforts" fruits. And it was a pleasure getting to know her. She's pretty, and very smart, and she can hold a conversation really, really well, so it was very easy connecting and getting to know her. Hmmm... I helped him get attached. Makes me wonder why I'm still single -.-.
Due to hanging out with Juswin for the majority of the time, I also got to know that Jace's dad was hospitalized recently. I planned to go visit him, and later hang out with Juswin, Jeffrey and Cherryl. Thing is, the day before the meet up, her dad passed away, and I attended the funeral instead. The very last time I had seen and actually talked to Jace deeply was during her birthday chalet, which was ages ago. A few chats here and there since I moved to KL, but it's sad that the next time I'd see her and chat deeply was her dad's funeral. She dealt with it well though.
I went clubbing with Lip Hai, Koon Phi, Yong Hong and Aaron's younger brother Alan. My first time going to Zouk Singapore. Not bad, but Alan had put a facial cleanser earlier, and in the black light, it reflected as blue! So in certain areas of the club, his face was like glowing blue! LOL! We managed to chat up a pair of girls, sisters in fact. Yanni and Susanna, from Indonesia. I asked if Yanni could dance with Alan, and he agreed, but he was so shy and chickened out in a sense, and the girls left soon after. Geez -.-.
Also, I went to visit Seong Voon's house for the first time. Pretty impressive home, with a hell lot of dogs. Had a tour of the place, and took his scooter out to a basketball court where we just took shots and caught up. As we continued to agree: "What we wouldn't exchange for..." Well. That's between us.
Also, I visited Gary in the hospital. The guy went through 12 surgeries in 30 days. Stray dogs chased him and he broke his leg after a jump or something. I went to visit him, but the time I arrived, he was in the middle of an operation, which was damn what the hell 'cause I had heard it was supposed to be the day after, not the day I was visiting! So I went to the canteen, and ate. The hospital's got a dessert stall which sells some strawberry thing. It's FREAKING nice. Recommended! I'm not a food critic, but its seriously something you have to try (if you end up in that hospital... which I can't remember the name). When I went back up a few hours later, he was "fresh" from the operation. He was still having the effects of the anesthetic, so he was like damn groggy. Kinda hard to chat, 'cause he'd say something, and when I replied, he'd sleep for a minute or so, then wake up and reply. Haha. I also got to see pictures of his broken leg, which was pretty cool, seeing all the blood and bone and muscles. Yeah, I said cool. I guess I am morbid. But how often can you say you saw your friend's leg bone? =x.
Like I said, superb quality time, although I visited very little people. Two months after that I skipped my Saturday class and went for Guo Fang's wedding with Callie. He's probably the first secondary school mate I know to get married. Well, okay, not the first, but the first marriage I attended of a secondary schoolmate. I think wedding invitations reveal a lot about a person. Back in secondary school I was in Guo Fang's class for 4 years. All the way through secondary school. Only Joel and Joycelyn share that "privilege". And although we were friendly, with the usual bickering and all, we weren't that tight. He was very good friends with the people from 178 basketball court, and a bunch of other guys. But none of them were invited. Instead, it was only mostly his closer army mates (which surprisingly included Chun Kiat; I didn't know they knew each other) and the Marsiling Secondary people he was close to (which included Li Qing, Debbie, Yue Rong, Serene and Yit Hoong) and to my surprise, Koh wee, Zhe Ming and I. Koh Wee and I were mostly tight with the Magic gang (none of whom were invited), and I didn't think Guo Fang and Zhe Ming were that close. But its interesting to see who are your true friends. Turns out that Callie knew a lot of people that Guo Fang knew in secondary school, so it does seem very destiny-ish eh? Yi Ai and Chia Wei were there too. And I realized how hard it is to shake off impressions you develop in secondary school. There's still an extreme dislike for Chia Wei, even though the events are long past us. And for Yi Ai, well I liked her last time. I didn't say a word to her at all throughout the day.
I was also the driver for part of Guo Fang's family, so I had a pretty important job as the groom's family driver. Lmao. I was supposed to follow the driver of another car which had the main family on it, but I couldn't speed 'cause Guo Fang's baby nephew was in the car, and I felt very reluctant to speed with a baby in the car. The damn driver was speeding damn fast so I lost him eventually. So we had to find our own way there, and we did, after a few U-turns. Singapore's roadsigns aren't that efficient after all. The dinner was good, and I was supposed to be the English MC, and Yue Rong the Chinese MC, but the entire dinner crowd was like Chinese speaking so Yue Rong did everything in the end. I can't imagine myself being an MC anyway! Anyway, congratulations once again.
I guess that covers quite a lot. Next time round, I think I wanna also catch up with some people I haven't caught up with in a very long time. People like Adriel, Yao Qi, Tiffany, Chia Sheng and a few others. Of course I'll meet up with the usuals I always visit, but since I've had quality visits the last 3 times I've been in Singapore, I guess it wouldn't hurt to meet up more people again next time round, at the sacrifice of quality time.
Chronicled
12:52 AM
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Monday, January 4, 2010
Recently I got offended by a church member.
He told me about a friend who happened to bump into a cellgroup member and they spent the day together. Let's call the friend A, and the cellgroup member K. And the one who offended me? He's the one I'm "talking" to here.
You said that K was unwise to to go out with A for the whole day, even though it was impromptu, and even said that that lowered her value as a girl. I mean, what the hell? Is a girl's value determined by going out with guys? Must she be exclusive to certain people to hold a value? Geez, seriously. Where'd you come up with that? All that comes from conservative narrow-minded Asian mentalities. You even had the gall to say that in City Harvest culture, girls and guy's don't go out one on one. HA, City Harvest culture? How come I don't know that? I've been a Christian and in City Harvest for 8 years now (my anniversary just passed), and never once have I heard of City Harvest culture as encompassing that. You've only been in CHC for 2 years, and you say that? Heck. I mean what's wrong with a girl going out with a guy one on one? You said that people might give and/or receive the wrong signals, and maybe get wrong impressions. That can happen anywhere, not just going out. I casually went out with Cindy a while back, no one said anything. I went out with kai Yih, no one said anything. I don't hide all these things, I'm totally transparent in my life. I don't brag and tell everyone, but I don't hide the fact that I went out with them. And I've got people who know, and witnesses too. And you've got the gall to say it's City Harvest culture? You don't know what the hell you're talking about. And if you want the same context, in Pyramid I bumped into Shevyn and we ended up walking around together and had dinner. And she's got a boyfriend. Why is no one condemning me for that? Her boyfriend's a cellgroup leader, and I think she would definitely know if that was so called City Harvest culture.
Don't make it even more narrow minded by saying I'm a Christian and been in church for many years, so I'm more trustworthy. That's just so untrue. I can be as easily tempted as anybody else. I'm still human. Hey, I go clubbing regularly, I dance with girls, sometimes kiss them in clubs and till now I still continue to get contacts from strangers (vast majority are girls who get my attention) and make new friends like that. Why don't you call me untrustworthy? Or flirty? If you're to properly judge me with the same criteria as A, then I think I should be more of a danger to the cellgroup sisters. I club, drink (A LOT), grind, kiss. My friend A does that as well. Don't use religion as another criteria. I know plenty of immoral Christians and brilliant atheists. And you can dare say he's inappropriate for having an impromptu outing with her? What about you? You call K at like past midnight and chat for hours sometimes, till she hangs up. What about your message of wrong impressions and signals? Are you not a hypocrite then? What gives you the right to say its appropriate for you and not him? Granted, you know K longer, but I trust A very deeply, and I know him way more than any one in the cellgroup. I can vouch that he knows his limits very well. Plus, the time spent knowing someone doesn't give you the right to say its appropriate. Who said quantity was quality?
You made it even worse by saying that during the cellgroup Christmas party he accompanied her down to buy the plastic cups. What's wrong with that? Should she go alone? Get another more "oh-so-trustworthy" brother? No one objected, and he offered to go with her. Tell me, is chivalry THAT dead for you? And you get paranoid by saying that he went down to throw the garbage with her. Hey, for your information, he began picking up the entire cellgroup's garbage alone, and nobody helped but me, and that's because I saw him do it. Even I didn't take initiative to collect the trash. NO ONE, not a SINGLE person aside from me and K bothered to help out A. What happened to the oh-so-worthy Christian brothers? He took initiative. His first time coming for cellgroup and he made the effort with no one telling him, to collect all the garbage and throw it. Of course K would go down with him 'cause she knows the way. And you can still say he's someone to be careful of? In the relatively short time I've gotten to know A, I've been pleasantly surprised when it comes down to true character, as its not what you'd expect from his exterior.
Also, before you mentioned all the stuff, you asked "Are you a core member?" I said yeah, but in my head I was thinking, does it matter? So what if I'm a core member (CHCKL's equivalent to CHC SG's helper, or connect group leader), it's just a title. What happened to mature Christians who don't have a title? What if I wasn't core? Then you wouldn't tell me? What if I don't want to be a leader, or core? Then what? I can't be trusted anymore? What if I was the most trustworthy person in the entire world but had no title? Then what? You wouldn't tell me? Just 'cause the vast majority of core members are mature, it doesn't mean all are. Look at the helpers in N337 when I was still there. James, Cedric, Paulina, Pei Jing. All have left church. James came back. But look at the rest. All totally gone. Not living lives they're particularly proud of. No details here. Leaders don't always make the right calls in raising up helpers you know. And you don't need a freaking helper or core member title just to be trusted. That's exactly the kind of narrow-mindedness that repels me from leadership all the more so.
In the future, if I have a wife, and you tell me my wife is someone to be careful about, I can say confidently that I would know better than you. Of course, A isn't my wife, but he's a very good friend with true character, and I can confidently say that I do know better. My impression of him changed as I got to know his true character, and so I trust him, and you have nothing whatsoever to counter that.
You're a very generous guy. Superbly. Your capacity in giving is ultimate and second to none in the cellgroup. However, your mentality is very conservative, narrow minded and you assume way too much; you talk without thinking and confirming the truth. I'm not mentioning the fact of the times you've lied to me too. Don't say you haven't, 'cause I know the truth in things you don't even wish I knew. And you're going to be a leader in the future.
People like you are the reason why I don't wanna be a leader in church, and anywhere else.
Chronicled
9:35 AM
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Sunday, January 3, 2010
A few months ago, Veronica Ho, my school's Dean of Studies (essentially, the vice-principal), passed away.
I attended her funeral (making this my 8th funeral attendance, as compared to 4 weddings), and out of all the students in the school I know, only Ruz and Xiao Qing were there. Everyone else was either a lecturer, a graduate or a friend. There were very, very few students. Veronica Ho was the entrepreneur woman of the year a few years ago, and she's the co-founder of The One Academy. Her legacy lives on with the school and the students. You'd think that such a marvelous woman would have had a huge crowd attending her funeral. Nopes.
Mighty as her achievements may be, it's a sad fact that the first, last, and only time I saw Veronica was in her casket. I never saw her while she was alive. Never. She has made zero impact on me, apart of the fact she's a co-founder of the school, to which I guess I owe her. But I'm not the only one saying that. She has made no impact whatsoever on any of the students, and even one of the top students, who represented the students in the funeral speech, admitted that he never interacted with her. I find that really sad, and wasted? I've only seen Tatsun Hoi, the principal, twice in my life. I saw him for the first time in school a few days before Veronica's funeral, and the second time at her funeral. I mean, what's up with that? Are the top staff so distanced from their students? He's not THAT busy. I'm sure he goes for meetings, trips, and all that, but I've been in this school for 2 years, and I only saw him once, excluding the funeral. And I would have still never seen Veronica if it weren't for the funeral. I think people wanted to come, to pay their last respects for a woman who's achieved a lot and is indirectly one of the reasons they're studying in an arts school now. But it's hard, because they can't think of anything she's done for them! Or for other students. People will think "What's the point of attending a funeral of someone who's made no impression on me?" I mean shouldn't a principal be more involved with a school he founded? Is the only appearance he makes only during the orientation? I have utmost respect for Tatsun. He's achieved a hell lot at such a young age, but just because you've achieved a lot, why does that give you the "air" to be in your own little bubble?
All the students received brochures and stuff that had information on the school when they first joined, and they've got a list of the bigshots in one of them. I've never seen any of them before, with the exception of Tatsun, and Veronica (thanks to the funeral). It's really a disappointing and sad fact. Why is it like this? You comment to the lecturer's on how a certain batch's figures are, whether its improving or deproving, and you increase the number of figures given. That's all I know you say. There's no transparency in school affairs, and the stuff I have found out only makes it way more disappointing. Especially with the MQA and the clubs issue. Seriously, that incident was totally pathetic.
I've also got to laugh at the fact that it was commented "TOA Night is for the students! We're not making any profits from this". But if not enough students join, you'll cancel it and never set up another event like this again. Gee, so much for the prom night being for the students. I don't care if you make any profits from this, 'cause the school already has a lot of money. The people who joined TOA Night are actually the people who care about enjoying while being in the school, and the people who want to be involved in the very few activities the school churns out. Not the lifeless morons who won't go 'cause they've got assignments to do. Not the people who won't join 'cause its quite pricey, and they won't bother sacrificing a bit to have fun. It's thanks to your legendary status in giving a huge amount of work to students that the turnout for TOA Night has been so low. Some people are so uptight about their work and results that nothing else matters to them anymore. You encourage people to do their work like hell, and only recently have been teling people to enjoy as well. Thing is, now with our free entry to Sunway Lagoon gone, there's a major source of enjoyment gone. And now a pricey TOA Night, that'll be cancelled if there's not a big enough turnout. You're gonna screw the people that actually care and bother to go. way to go. If you truly cared, you'd cover the costs for the low turnout, and still continue it for the rest of us who joined. Perhaps it could be done on a smaller scale, if there were so little people. The school took 16 years to come up with their first clubs and societies (which only number 3 or 4 at the moment) and to come up with a prom night of sorts. It's not like you don't have the cash. The school fees are very high, and the resources aren't that impressive for the amount we pay.
Wow. What a rant. Don't get me wrong. I like my school, even as they continue to torture me, and Boon Tiong and Irwin (and all the library staff) continue to be perpetual morons. There's a lot to like, but lately, there's a lot to dislike as well, once you find out about all the stuff going on. I'm not bitching about the figures for AD students, I'm not bitching about the fact that a world-class school is actually a bunch of shoplots with no true campus. I'm just saying, for the higher up staff... get involved with the students. Not every single one of course, but make an effort at least. I don't think the current "meet the principal" sessions count, 'cause it's the students coming to you. And I didn't even know about it till one of my friends mentioned it. Improve the wifi, seriously. It sucks now. And the aircon in certain rooms are more like heaters. Do something about that.
These little things all help us to endure the workload you proudly give us, and show us you care and bother... bit by bit.
Chronicled
8:45 AM
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